average, today

do we have an average day?

no. but today was like this:

Awake at 6am, my new early. The Man spent the night dog comforting, work readying time so I take pup outside nursing cup of chamomile tea like it may help revive. Sit, stunned, gritty eyed at the HUGE noise lots of tiny birds can make. Is every bird in the world in my garden this dawn? Are my ears brand new, replaced during the night by ones of a bat? I stare blearily at tiny tree on the other side of the stream (rowan maybe?) it has sprung up newly this year and makes me feel peaceful: it is just itself, not trying to be anything else, alive and alive and alive, right there, not going anywhere, swayed by wind. Blue sky, sunny day promised. I love this time of day, *anything* might happen today, it's all so fresh and unsullied, no one pissed you off yet (hopefully in this short time you didn't manage to either) and there's the possibility, expectation..... not the might-I-win-the-lottery- sort of possibility (guess I might have to actually play to be in with a chance of winning) just a quiet hopefulness.

Time to pick up dog poop (I just wrote 'god' poop). Tiny girl in doorway with bed hair and tiny pj's, looking confused (I know that feeling at 6am, it's just a big WHY?). Scoop her up and put on her jumper. We wait for the pup to finish mooching and then I make her breakfast. Boys appear in drips and they eat too. Goodbyes to Daddy-O (Grumpy sleepless Man today, poor thing). Send boys outside with dog while I dress (and gather laundry and pull back duvets in an approximation of bed making/airing).

One boy feeds chickens, another finds a whole catch of eggs in a bush (ah! so that's why she *hasn't* been laying). We take it in turns getting Ginny to sit and lie down for us in between reading books, playing on bikes and hanging out washing (me). I catch pup *after* she had a fun fun fun time chasing the chickens (they didn't say so but doubt they found similar enjoyment in experience). Block off that pathway with outdoor toys. Wash dishes, load washing machine, clean downstairs bathroom.... make self an omelette. Tell boys I will play monopoly with them and then we all go outside and forget the all about it. Boys play on computer, online games. Girl outside singing with Ginny chasing her bike wheel. I watch some cyclists whoosh by in neon.

It's 10am. How can it only be 10am? It feels like 3pm. How to get through such long days? I like waking gracefully at 9 and then reading quietly to waken myself, stretching out, thinking a bit, wondering, this and that. Not whamming down and out through the door pre 6am. How do people with outside jobs do this? I am looking at my dh differently. Jesus. You do this? And also this: puppy! Stop whining for me and sleep!

Scrambled together bagels and turkey for hungry children and apricots and walnuts for self. Make a smoothie. Marvel at the lovely lovey sun. Panting heat makes dog lazy and sleepy outdoors and is marvelous for me who can close own eyes and enjoy sun, murmuring one syllable and unidentifiable comments in the positive to enthusiastic son rambling on about the virtue of various Legos. I fake this well as he seems satisfied. Realise he is outside with me in the first place awaiting the ever late/lazy postman for latest Lego instalment we ordered together on Sunday to boost his spirits after brief illness.

Leave him hopping from one foot to another in anticipation and make couple of phone calls. One secures quick immediate trip to vet. Bundle everyone into car, dog on boy's knee all hugged in. Make it to vet by 11am. Discuss vaccinations, dog sags sleepily and heavily in arms, peaceful. Decide not to bother right now as puppy still coasting on mother's antibodies. Feel relieved. Don't like vaccinations, needles or antiseptic rooms. Muse on this as make flying pit stop to organic butcher. He gives me huge bag of chicken bones (carcasses and wings and other bits) all for free. Free dog food! Check out Work Wonders, Raw Meaty Bones, great book on feeding dogs raw - sweet breathe, no body odor, tiny poops that crumble away and healthier dogs. Can't resist the tiny promotion here.

TMI on dog feeding. Really. But interesting all the same. Postman still not arrived, then does but no Lego. Big sigh and sad boy. Brave. Can he live? He thinks he might. Fortifies self with computer game to soothe and restore disappointed equilibrium. Feel similarly tired, stop self from loitering near the chocolate cupboard and play snap instead with Girl. Go back and eat a piece.

Lunch? Not dinner, yet? Surely it must be really late.... Rustle up snacks and then clear away, popping in and out to supervise puppy in stream (puppy LOVING stream). Dog falls into deep sleep by Aga so sneak off to hanging out laundry, sweep trampoline of pine needles, and take girl to veggie garden. Much neglected this past week and pull out masses of gone to seed rocket and radishes for guinea pigs. Haul over bucket of water (check on baby-dog, still asleep, yippeee), weed a bit then go and find cowboy style sun hat.

Friend arrives with sons and all children dash off doing goodness-knows-what and what-ever-it-is-is-fine. St and drink tea and chat and laugh in the sun, puppy now asleep under my feet in shade of table. Eat blueberries with Girly. Friend takes all boys (including own) to Festival grounds for another show (we are doing the whole week of everything here, saw Michael Morpurgo yesterday reading aloud War Horse); children's comedy writer today. Put Pingu on for tired girl and tuck her in on sofa with stripey blanket. She comes through after five seconds asking for food. I think sometimes the background music of my life is kids telling me they are hungry. Or shouting 'finished! from the bathroom. I can live with it, I am useful see, and obviously much needed. Even if not entirely for my own charms. Ability to wield knives, open high cupboards have ears, hands, breasts and a wallet is pretty much enough.

Stash girl into car seat and put puppy by her feet, both up front. Pat whining puppy (and child) and slot biscuits into mouths (see? same, same). Driving I stroke a velvet soft ear and glance down to see dark warm eyes staring at me in adoration, watching my every move, hungrily maybe (biscuit anticipation?). When did anyone last look at me like this? Puppy love. For sure.

Happy hot boys, ice cream faces. Home again. Start making chicken soup and slide salmon fish fingers into oven for non chicken people (being kind to self by not making battered crumb fish pieces by hand, Nigella style, or not.... (bet she has fish fingers in her freezer). Dog dashing about underfoot in and out of house, looking for things/people to chew. Toss her a bone after making her lie down to wait for a second - practice, practice I see is a lovely all day long event. Send everyone outside with plates (and ketchup). Man home, just as tired, not as grumpy. Feed him. Distinct lack of puppy eyes (I check). Feel like telling him only can see he is half asleep over soup, may not be nicest thing I could say, offer to get up with puppy tonight, then remember it's my turn anyway. He knows I always crave sleep, can do 12 hours happily. Probably we'll share, cos' he's like that. Puppy eyes no, love yes.

Dishes in sink soaking, children in bath soaking (both mean I have done both something and yet, really, nothing, layzee (or tired) style, as per the norm). I am ready for bed, really am. The sky is light. Dog asleep (for now). It's 8pm.

This is probably a pretty average day. Today at least.